How to do Archery

You have shot your arrow, congratulations! Now you must hit your target. Hopefully you chose a nice wide target that is standing still. If your target is motionless ascertain if it is sentient and if it is conscious. If so, make sure it is aware you are shooting at it, for the arrow one foresees arrives more gently.

If your target is in motion, determine why your target is in motion. Is your target being pulled or propelled somehow, or is it moving under its own power? If your target is moving itself, ask your target why is it in motion? This is only common courtesy. Under circumstances such as these, politeness is a target we all must aim for.

If your target is in rapid motion, the element of speed might prevent or preclude its reply to your inquiry. In this case you must determine the direction of your target’s motion. If it is aiming for a position away from your own, you must assume that your target is in motion because it does not want to be your target. If your target does not tell you why it is moving and it is not in rapid motion, this may be due to a communication barrier or timidity. Perhaps smile to put your target at ease. Make it a tight smile, do not show your teeth! For some targets, too toothy a greeting may be misconstrued as extreme impoliteness, and in such cases your target may determine that you would make a fine target yourself. You may not have time to explain that you do not wish to be a target. Your target may not trouble to ask. Rude.

If you have become your target’s target and your target is now in motion toward you, determine if you wish to be your target’s target. If so, hold still.

If you do not wish to become your target’s target, you must attempt to arrest your target’s motion. Ascertain the precise location of your target. Is your target occupying a position in space? Is that position in space exactly its own size? If it does not occupy a position exactly it’s own size perhaps your target is not made of matter or has no mass. In that case your target is welcome to come at you with infinite velocity. You will be perfectly all right unless you become an unstoppable force. Do not become an unstoppable force. Yield a little.

If your target holds a position in space exactly its own size, determine if it occupies a position in time. If it occupies a position in time, is that position in time made of a moment of time and nothing else? Anything else going on in there? Think small, take all time down to a point and look. If something’s moving in there, then there must be more moments than the one you are aiming to see. Try to reduce time to a singularity and see if the moment is behaving itself.

If your target is occupying a moment in which nothing else is happening, that is, a moment that takes up zero amount of time, then within that moment your target is at rest. Your target is no longer moving toward you. This is excellent unto itself, you are now quite safe! However, you must also ascertain if temporality, duration in particular, is made up of a string of discrete moments, each with an immediate predecessor and successor like the still frames of a film. If so, this is also good news! You will be relieved to hear that in every single discrete moment you choose to examine, your target will be at rest. To ensure your safety try to examine them all.

Of course, your target will be at rest only if it is coming at you through quantifiable space and time. Determine if space and time indeed comes in discrete quanta, or if it is continuous. If it is continuous and not made of discrete bits, you may still be in luck as in this case space and time can be divided infinitely. If there seems to be no stopping your target from tearing straight for your throat, let there be no stopping you from dividing the space between you and your oncoming target as much as you like. Indeed as much as you can, which you must ensure to be as much as there is. To accomplish infinite division of space you must endeavor for your target to travel half the distance between itself and you. Before it can travel half the distance between itself and you, it must travel half that half distance, but prior to that it must travel half that distance and so on from everlasting to everlasting, forever and ever, world without end, etc. Keep cutting the distance between yourself and your target in half you and you will be just fine for the present. Do choose your targets more carefully in future.